Honoring Lost Loved Ones

When you think about it, one of the most important parts of your wedding is sharing it with the people that mean the most to you. For many couples, some of the most important people in their lives are no longer with us, and not having them present, leaves an inevitable void.

Although we can not change the fact that they cannot be there with us in body, we can certainly honor that they are there with us in spirit.

Here are a few of my favorite ways of recognizing lost loved ones on your wedding day:

~ Reserve an empty chair in the front row of the ceremony, by placing a single white rose on it. You can even tie a little tag to it that says, "In memory of (your loved one's name). He/She is with us today in spirit."

~ Have your officiant take a moment of silence after reading the name of your loved one(s). It is amazing the impact that silence can have.

~ As a part of the ceremony, have your officiant read some words about the departed, and then release a single white dove. I recently did this for a bride who had just lost her father and the sound of the dove's wings in the silence of the crowd was incredibly moving.

~ Have a special memorial table. Place a framed picture of your loved one with a single candle burning in their honor. You may even choose to add a note on the table recognizing the person and how much they meant to you.

~ Make a donation in honor of the deceased in lieu of a favor. At a wedding a couple years ago, my clients had little scrolls made up to put at each place setting that told the guests that they made a donation to the American Cancer Society, in honor of the bride's mother who lost her battle with cancer.

A wedding is such a joyous occasion, and it is unfortunate that sometimes there is an underlying sadness. But the common thread between your wedding and your loss, is love. And love never fails.